Life is good.

I re-read yesterday’s post. I sounded like a whiny little bitch complaining about a bad beat after flopping a straight with 6-3 off and losing to someone holding KK hitting a runner-runner full house. Maybe that comparison doesn’t apply completely but you know what I mean.

Basically, I have no business complaining, because…

- Everything I have ever wanted or needed has been handed to me.
- I have a decent job that’s not too stressful.
- I get paid a decent wage and get health insurance.
- My commute is 25 minutes and doesn’t involve driving.
- I have a girlfriend that loves me and we own a nice place in a nice neighborhood.
- We have a sweet 1995 Ford Taurus so we can drive places.
- My legs, arms, and eyeballs are all fully functional.

Those are the positive things I can think of right now, and I guess my life is pretty damn good. Sometimes I step back, though, and realize how boring and monotonous it is, how I’m not passionate about my profession and wish I was doing something else.

I’m where I am because that’s where I choose to be. If I don’t like anything I can change it. But that takes effort. It’s easier just to stay in the same place and accept things the way they are. If there is one thing I’m good at, it’s accepting things the way they are.

I think that’s why I (and a lot of other people) became so obsessed with poker. It provided some kind of fantasy escape, because it doesn’t take a lot of effort to sit at a computer and imagine that one day I would be a rich-ass poker pro. Therefore, it would be unnecessary to change my job situation or anything else, because pretty soon I would make a lot of money from poker and that would make everything super-duper. Roflmao.

When I was 12 I fantasized about playing basketball for the Suns and actually thought it was possible. Poker provides a new, unrealistic dream that I can think is possible. I have undergone somewhat of a reality check during the past month or so, accepting that poker isn't going to save me. Life is good and I can't complain, but this isn't exactly how I pictured things ending up. It's up to me to change it. If I don't, that's my choice and no one else's.

I'm not going to quit playing poker, though.